First One Star Rating? Ouch. But Wait a Second.....

In my obsessive checking of Dog Duty's sales rank on Amazon, I crashed into my first one-star rating that the book received. Uno. Solo. Lonely. So alone. No dance partner. A universe can't survive with only one-star, right? 

And it stung, but not as bad as I thought it would. It still sucks to see that, and that it's permanent, but you really have no control over how someone reacts to your work, so you have to just let it go.

Ah, fuck it.

The one-star review reads as follows: 

"Not a well written book. Slow and boring. Had one whole chapter that every sentence being with "you". Could not finish it."

Not that I'm one to talk, but a twenty-two word review that leads with "Not a well written book" having a typo in it brought a smile to my face. 

And that chapter in question? It's Chapter Four, which is "Speaking in the Second Dog (in the room)." And as we all know, when one (which in this case is our narrator) speaks in the second person, the word "you" comes up a lot. 

Now for a bit of advice for other writers who finds themselves stung by a supposed harsh review? It's easier said than done, but a few things to remember here to help you move past it.

1. Doesn't mean you're a One-Star person. This is important! It's a not a review of your person. A lot of writers blur these lines. Everyone does. After all, if it's your "blood" (or insert your own applicable metaphor) on the page, how could that not be a review of who you are, right down to your very soul?! 

I mean, I don't know, maybe you are a shitty person, who knows, but it's not based on your writing or your book.

2. Try to remember those 3-5 star reviews. There are always more people who enjoy your work out there. That's your audience. Go to them. 

3. It's going to take a lot of hits and misses for you to build your audience. Eventually, as you publish more and more, the audience will evolved into your audience and the people who aren't a part of that group will go away to find another author. Their loss, right?

4. This happens to everyone. EVERYONE. For example, here are a few other one-star reviews from some of my favorite novels that I plucked from Amazon:

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn - "Boring and very difficult to read. I don't get how this is a classic."

The Killer Inside Me - "Not good at all.......nothing what I suspense, no drama, no thrills......skip this one."

Treasure Island - "This book is the worst book I ever read to much drama and it is really boring so don't read this book ever."

Ask the Dust - "I didn't like this book at all. None of the characters is likeable, particularly the narrator. I kept waiting and waiting for this book to end. Its depiction of crazed people smoking pot in what could have been on opium den is laughable. What a waste of time. The prose is stiff and ill-advised."

Ah, Fuck it. Yes, that's your answer? That's your answer for everything....
Yes. Yes, that's my answer. And I will tattoo it on my forehead.....


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